Nature vs. Nurture

I chose "Getting Better" as the title because for the past few weeks I have been feeling  sh*t (sorry for the dirty word but it's the perfect word to describe what I felt) about myself. It was the first time I felt extremely lonely and alone! Ever since I was a kid I have this tendency of not letting my problems ruin my mood, it's like I dont consider it as my problem and just let it pass unless it's a very serious one but for the past few weeks that technique of mine didn't work out.

I've experienced different depressing personal issues which really surprised me because I did not expect that someone like me would experience something like those. In the forefront is my issue about mama. We have developed a very good relationship and didn't have a serious fight anymore that's why when we fought 2 weeks ago I felt really really sad. I tried my best not to answer her back and I did but I spent the night crying and as a result, I realized how bad my relationship is with the people I most care about. The next day I texted my mom and said sorry cause I dont have the courage to do it personally and she said she is sorry too for being too harsh on me. :) But the battle is still on cause my other problems are still bothering me!</3 Ill try to explain it by telling how grateful, overwhelmed, blessed, happy I'am to have met my high school friends (Hi chicas!) They are the people who made me feel extraordinarily special, every minute I spend with them is always full of happy feelings ever since high school, they never failed to make me laugh and it's amazing how very very close we are even though we dont get to see each other everyday. We've been through a lot of problems but in the end kami kami pa rin yung magkakasama, we are aware of the dirty little secrets of each one of us and that didn't become an issue that can affect our friendship and I think that proves how strong our bond is and Im confident to say that our friendship will last a lifetime! Im really hoping I could have that kind of relationship with my college friends, Im looking forward to a deeper relationship with them and days filled with good vibes. I still have some other issues but Id rather keep those to myself cause I dont want to start a fight.nyahaha.

So back to the title, I guess my special technique worked out already or maybe I just learned how to accept what I have and started thinking about all the beauty still left around me. I realized that we really cannot please everyone and that I shouldn't expect people to treat me the way I want them to treat me cause not all of them really cares but it's A-okay. Because of that I became the person I used to be, no more bad vibes, no more oversensitive, emo Katrina. Yey!:D:))